Thailand and “The Problem of Pain”

“[Christianity] is not a system into which we have to fit the awkward fact of pain: it is itself one of the awkward facts which  have to be fitted into any system we make.  In a sense, it creates, rather than solves, the problem of pain, for pain would be no problem unless, side by side with out daily experience of this painful world, we had received what we think a good assurance that ultimate reality is righteous and loving” (14, The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis).

It’s 5AM on Wednesday morning here in Chiang Rai, Thailand.  After falling asleep to LOST last night, my first night of sleep has been cut short by my jet lag.  So I figured I would do my introvert thing (that is, read and write) while everyone is still asleep (and hopefully still have time to catch up on the LOST episode I missed last night .

I pulled C.S. Lewis” The Problem of Pain out of my bookshelf just a few moments before we left for SFO, thinking that it might be a good frame for a trip that will center on the prevention of child prostitution in a country rife with an underage sex trade.  Couple that with a) my melancholy personality and b) my brother-in-law’s struggle with life-threatening cancer, and I feel like pain, in all of its aspects, might be one of the points of exploration for this trip.

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Thailand has already been a breathe of fresh air to me.  The pace of life here in the Northern Thailand is way slower than the Bay Area (as most places are).  We also get to stay, explore, and have fun with two of our closest friends.  And more, I have no responsibilities other than to be exposed to what The SOLD Project is doing here.  It’s a great gift of a break for me, and I can already feel how this next batch of days will be an opportunity to seek God and His Word, and in so doing, reflect on, question, challenge, and reshape the mindset that I’ve been growing over the last while…

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Lewis writes that an ongoing belief in and relationship with Jesus Christ, in a sense, creates a problem within any person: how can a loving, righteous God allow human realities to be so full of awful events and experiences?   I remember first reading The Problem of Pain at the beginning of college, before I’d ever experienced any significant struggles.  I couldn’t really understand it intellectually, and I for sure had no experience to understand it personally.  My first 18 years had kept me oblivious to almost all of the significant struggles that people deal with at an early age.  College came, and very quickly I was introduced to failure – something I was had not experienced much of, had never been good at handling, and still hate with a passion today.  It hasn’t been until these three years since college that pain has become a most significant of problems – and dealing with that pain one of the most daily of routines.

So now I sit here in Chiang Mai, in the northern part of a country that is so picturesque on the surface, yet has this horrible underbelly of exploitation – exploitation that forces any self-centered, melancholy person put in perspective his own issues.

If there’s one thing that I’m glad I’ve learned over the last couple years, it’s that pain is ubiquitous and affects all.  I’m not the only person who deals with a deep hate of failure or a sense of inadequacy or regret over the horrible decisions of the past, nor is my family the only family to deal with cancer (or any other major family calamity) over this past year.  At the same time, the problem of pain will not drown out the hope that is so readily available to any awful situation.  Here’s to fighting for hope amidst the pain drops…

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~ by Kevin George Carey on January 5, 2010.